Finding the right fit with your babysitter or nanny

mother lifting happy baby

Written by the Progyny Editorial Team — October 2025. 

If you’re looking for a babysitter, nanny, or other in-home caregiver, it’s so important to find the right fit. And that goes for everyone: you, your child(ren), and the caregiver.

How will you know if you’ve found the right match? Here are a few things to think about.

Set expectations

It’s your job to be clear about your expectations the first time you speak with a caregiving candidate.

Let them know about the pay, location, hours, and duration (like 1 year or 3 months). Tell them a bit about your family (including pets), along with your kids’ ages and personalities.

And of course, be sure to describe the job duties. This may include things like:

  • Preparing bottles, snacks, and meals
  • Changing diapers
  • Putting your child down to nap
  • Following a bedtime routine
  • Helping with your child’s medical needs
  • Light cleanup or household tasks
  • Being around or caring for pets

Additional responsibilities may include:

  • Driving children to school or activities
  • Potty training or helping transition to solid food
  • Speaking another language
  • Tutoring or homework help
  • Laundry or housekeeping

Assess fit and qualifications

It might take a few interactions to get to know a candidate, their experience, and their style. Scheduling a phone interview, an in-person meeting, and/or a trial run can help you decide if they will be a good fit for your family.

You can ask questions like:

  • Tell me about yourself and your background in childcare.
  • What do you enjoy most about childcare?
  • What do you find most challenging about it?
  • Tell me about a time you handled an emergency while caring for a child.
  • How do you approach discipline?
  • What is your approach to screen time?

Decide if you’d like the caregiver to be certified in infant and child CPR, or if you’re looking for someone who has taken courses in early childhood education.

You can request professional references if you’d like to talk to someone they have worked for in the past.

Talk about pay

It’s a good idea to be upfront about the rate you are going to offer, instead of asking for the caregiver’s rate. To come up with this amount, think about the job duties you’re requesting and research the average rates in your area.

It’s appropriate to offer a pay rate based on skill level and experience. More detailed pay information can be discussed later in the process, like frequency and method of payment.

Cover the logistics

If you feel like the caregiver would be a good fit, consider discussing detailed logistics like:

  • If they have reliable transportation, and reimbursement if they are using their car to transport your kids
  • Giving advance notice for absences
  • Cancelling services if your child is sick, and if the caregiver will still be paid
  • Number of paid vacations, sick days, and holidays (if applicable)
  • Any questions or concerns they have for you

Hiring a caregiver is a big decision. Being clear about your needs and asking questions about what’s most important to you and your family will help you feel comfortable with your choice. Your Progyny Care Advocate is also here for you if you have questions.