Episode 120: Maybe a Baby? The Adoption Journey

A family building journey may not always be straight forward and easy. And most times those feelings of hope and positivity may fade into confusion and gut-wrenching disappointment. This is what it was like for Claire and Patrick Gibson. As time passed and fertility treatments failed, Claire continued to struggle to find the right answers. However, those answers led to a breath of fresh air, building a family through adoption.

In this episode, Claire discusses her debate over fostering or adopting a child, the experience and difference between domestic and international adoption, and what led her and husband to their decision.

Guest: Claire Gibson, author of Beyond the Point

Host: Lissa Kline, Progyny

For more information, visit Progyny’s Podcast page and Progyny’s Education page for more resources.

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Have a question, comment, or want to share your story? Email us at thisisinfertility@progyny.com.

Here are some highlights from this episode:

Claire’s Fertility Journey Comes to an End

11:39 – 12:43

Claire Gibson: As we got deeper and deeper into this forest of infertility, that idea of adoption, always felt like a breath of fresh air. Whenever I thought about it, I felt like at least if we move toward adoption, I don’t have to be on this roller coaster of fertility drugs and in costs that just felt like I was writing checks that would just go out the window. After that first IUI, my husband and I actually were in a pretty dark place in our marriage. We decided to just put everything on hold, focus on our marriage and focus on our relationship. During those months that we focused on our relationship, it became clear that we were both wanting to seek out something different, something that could put us back on the same team and something that could inspire us. We wanted something that would take us out of this roller coaster of fertility treatments that just didn’t feel like was working for us.

 Adoption Realization

17:37 – 18:02

Claire Gibson: It really opened our eyes to just how important it is to be able to welcome a child of any race or welcome a child with any different ability. It kind of opened our hearts to the idea of caring for a child that may not be like us, and obviously not genetically like us, but also maybe had a different culture or a different background or special needs. We just opened our hearts and our minds.

Parental Lessons Learned

32:07 – 32:28

Claire Gibson: That’s one cool thing about going to adoption coming from the experience of infertility. I am very familiar with what grief feels like and when my children have to grapple with their story. I am going to be much better of a parent to be able to empathize with some of the sadness that comes with adoption.