Finding Romance on Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day, the day for love and joy but for those struggling with infertility or going through fertility treatments, this day can be easily overlooked. But why not take a break from worrying about the big things in life (like your fertility treatment, your family, finances, job etc!) and instead celebrate what Valentine’s Day has to offer.

Whether you’re single or in a relationship, the secret to Valentine’s Day is to remember the little things in your life –  the things that make you feel happy and loved, like sweet memories, favorite moments, fragrant flowers and delicious candy!

For the couples:

If you are a couple going through the stress of fertility treatment, Valentine’s Day can be the one day you take a break from worrying, watching and waiting for pregnancy results.  Instead, focus on the little things that you both enjoy.  Play a game you used to play just the two of you, like backgammon or Rock Band. Play your favorite song from when you and your partner started dating. If the music is faster than your heartbeat, it is energizing, so get up and dance! If its slower than your heartbeat, it is relaxing, so share a massage or bath. If you start with the little expressions of affection, the big finish, sex, often follows naturally!

Another way to treasure the little things is to pull out old photos from your early days and reminisce your nights together. Or take a drive to visit close friends or go to your favorite ice-cream shop.

Fill Valentine’s Day with the fun that helps you forget about the stress of fertility treatment.

For the singles:

If you’re single, don’t give away the power to feel happy and loved on Valentine’s Day, or any day! You have decided you don’t need someone else in order to have a baby, well you don’t need someone else in order to enjoy Valentine’s Day, either.

Since the most important relationship in your life is the relationship with yourself, show yourself that love on Valentine’s Day! This is the day to celebrate yourself and do what makes you happy – is it cookies in bed? Is it watching your favorite movie? Whatever it is, do it!

And if you are going through fertility treatment, it’s also a good day to give yourself a break from the, “should’ve, could’ve and would’ve” because going through treatment is stressful enough. If you have not been kind and loving to yourself for the past 365 days, start doing it on Valentine’s Day and then continue throughout your treatment and your life.

In the end, the best gift you can give yourself is a break from all the big things in life and really cherish the small things. Those small things can give you the love and joy you deserve every day, especially on this holiday.

By: Dr. Georgia Witkin, Head of Patient Services Development at Progyny